It has been approximately 43 months and 13 days since my last post on here. That’s over 3.5 years. To say that a lot has happened in the past 3.5 years is quite an understatement (duh). So, where to begin?
First, I clicked on my “About” section, and it says I’m 24-years-old. To prevent any lying or false information, I am now 26-years-old (almost 27). That’s a good place to start.
Second, it is November in the year 2020. If you’re reading this, that means you have somehow survived the absolute insanity that encompasses the year 2020 (almost). I thought my life was flipped upside down when I moved across the globe, but that was nothing compared to what this year has brought – not only for me and my loved ones, but for every single one of us.
Third, what do I have to say that’s so important after 3.5 years of silence? I’m not so sure. I guess I have to keep writing and you have to keep reading to find out.
I really don’t want this post to be about politics, the pandemic, or any other depressing thing that’s controlled our lives this year. Yet, these are the scenarios that usually test us the most and where the most transformational experiences comes from, isn’t it? Almost like how the best songs are produced after a heart-wrenching break-up or a devastating event. We tap into these deep parts of us that are usually neglected, and we find ways to cope, process, heal. It’s a form of resiliency – which I’ll touch on momentarily.
My question for you: what ugly and not-nice things have bubbled to the surface in you this year? Rhetorical question, of course. Please don’t send me your list…unless of course you really want to in order to make me feel better about my exhaustive list full of self-centered tendencies that neglect loving and caring about others.
Now, look at your list and throw it away and pretend like it’s not true. Ha, just kidding.
Look at your list and, instead of feeling the shame or guilt or discouraging feelings that comes with it, I want you to reframe your perspective and actually see it as a challenge, an opportunity. A challenge for you to work towards a different outcome moving forward. An opportunity to do better next time. When we know better, we can then do better. This is resiliency in action.
More than ever, I feel like this year is teaching me the complicated relationship between grace and discipline. Give yourself grace – it’s been an insanely tough year. But at the same time, discipline yourself to keep pushing to be better and do better. This year isn’t an excuse to sit back and blame becoming a sh*tty person on the election or the pandemic or anything outside of yourself. It’s an opportunity to learn what it means to give yourself grace that a lot has happened and has affected you that’s been out of your control, and then realize that you have a responsibility to choose how you’re going to let all that change manifest in you. Is it manifesting becoming lazy and unhealthy, fueling the division towards those with different opinions than you, looking out only for yourself instead of others? Or is it manifesting a new level of gratitude for what hasn’t been taken away from you, a decision to focus on a healthy lifestyle, and a remembrance to seek out others interests over your own as often as you can?
The choice is yours. And mine. And your friend’s. And your family’s. That’s the gift of being human and being given a free will – we really get to choose. But just remember, whatever you’re choosing will not only affect yourself, but all those who are around you. Quarantine this year has reminded me just how much we need one another and how others need us. They need our attention, our care, our love, and vice versa.
So I guess this is a post about resiliency (and grace, and love, and discipline, and choices…lol). Resiliency is something that can’t be built unless you’re being confronted with something really hard that requires characteristics like grit and effort to overcome it. Then all of a sudden, it starts to bloom & blossom, preparing you for the next pandemic. Haha, just kidding (hopefully).
I hope throughout all of these tough events of 2020, you remember what our purpose is here on earth: Love God, love others. It’s somehow the simplest yet hardest things to do.
My new motto: 2020, Year of the Resilient.
torikoconnor 